tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32879642.post6458248297666527782..comments2023-04-10T05:58:17.419-07:00Comments on SamuelMartin: Controversial: To Spank or Not to Spank by Matt "Coach" FureySamuel Martinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10073427515747592924noreply@blogger.comBlogger1125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32879642.post-4927525192706260872014-10-01T01:22:21.472-07:002014-10-01T01:22:21.472-07:00As much as I "agree" this would work for...As much as I "agree" this would work for humble open minded parents,as you know,as we've all discussed in thread after thread, has been testified by MOST Christians I hear- they DO get themselves "calm" first. Then still are ingrained to think the spanking is coming from "love".... I'd like to hear your thoughts on this. I'm glad to hear someone going beneath the surface at least SOME....this wouldn't have worked with my parents (who were abused and widely over the top in their control due to their own pasts),and wouldn't have worked with my husband's parents who were quite peaceful parents but believed this must be<br />done because the original "offence" HAPPENED. I have come to think that all spankings....even if the parent has calmed themselves and doesn't even WANT to follow this through, will do so. Since the "in the moment" anger is immediately present,when the undesirable <br />behavior happenes, it's STILL a choice made as a direct result of that anger....while the parent got to remove themselves and calm down, the child got no such opportunity. Their FIRST punishment was being filled with dread. THEN,if the adult was mindful and knew another way, it'd be a step forward if they'd choose reconnection with their child (I know you understand much of this much better than me but this is simply my reaction) if the parent believes in "loving spankings" this will simply reinforce that original assertion. It will cause some who's grip on this practice may have loosened, to dig in their heels once again "AHA, it IS ok because I've been TOLD it MEANS love!" This kind of rubbed me the wrong way just knowing this information would be further justification and would have caused even more damage in my own family.I think this is a better response, for those who understand the risk of very real damage they are trying to eliminate from their lives (or have abandoned-we know it's wrong and this it something I can grasp)<br />But for the typical pro-spanker it wouldn't phase them... (I may not be seeing what you are in this so feel free to help me) let me know if what I've said makes sense! It'd be a different world if spanking parents took such a story and it changed their approach to discipline. As we know it's nearly in their blood to file this into "what they want to hear" because spanking children is nearly a religion to many who don't even claim a faith....I DO like this author though, and I like thinking these things through and seeing what COULD help a person on the <br />fence in regards to corporal punishment:-) Becky TuckerAnonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05291573183578588114noreply@blogger.com